Since the mood on this board........

has been not so great. I felt this appropriate.


How To Shower Like a Woman:

Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper
according to lights and darks.


Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note
to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.


Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long
loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.


Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added
vitamins.


Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced
with real passion fruit.


Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes
until red.


Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body
wash.


Rinse conditioner off hair.

Shave armpits and legs.

Turn off shower.

Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.

Spray mold spots with Tilex.


Get out of shower and stand on bath mat.


Dry with towel the size of a small country.


Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.

Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.


If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.



How To Shower Like a Man:

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave
them in a pile.

Walk naked to the bathroom.

If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the
woo-woo' sound.


Look at your manly physique in the mirror.


Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your ass.


Get in the shower Wash your face. Wash your armpits.


Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.


Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.


Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.


Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the
soap.


Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. Pee.


Rinse off and get out of shower. Avoid bath mat.


Dry off forearms and butt only.


Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of
tub the whole time.


Admire wiener size in mirror again. Shake it to watch water fly
off.


Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.


Return to bedroom with towel around waist.


If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make
the woo-woo' sound again.


Throw wet towel on bed.


If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth
behind this, there is something so very wrong with you.


Have a great day! And, "woo woo"!!!




Harley thought it was funny...Bwahahahaha!!!!!!!




_________________________________________________________________

 

lol, now thats true. i ,m gonna try that shake and see water come off. lol,

 

WAYYY TOOO FUNNY lmfao

 

is there a hidden camera in my bathroom? Cuz that's pretty much the routine, lol. Though, I am unable to make a shampoo mohawk.....

 

Lol. So true, thanx for the laugh. and you know what this made me want to go take a shower.

p.s. how do you give rep points for posts?

 

OK this brought me to tears.......Dang

 

Damn how many times i gotta tell u stop spying on me lol...WOOWOO

 

lmao ... now I know where my husband gets that "woo woo" thing from !!!

(Along w/ leaving his clothes in a pile, leaving water all over the place, spending 30 minutes washing his ... what was I going to say?)

 

woowoo??? Like my husband does...hehehehehe

 

That's why its so funny, is so damn true...LOL! I made the mistake of reading this out loud to Joey while Blaize was sitting there. I got "WooWooed" by my 5 yr old the other night. He got a smack to his little naked woo woo butt...LOL

 

WOW... that was really funny!! Think I send that one out to my co-workers as well..... LMAO!


puregame

 

are you stocking me.

 

Very cute...and how true it is!
Thanks for the laugh!

 

lmao ... now THAT is funny!

 

That is funny!!!

 

HAHAHA.. Thanks! I was having a crappy day (I think its the weather) tha made me laugh! I am bad about all of that.. well all but making the mohawk thing.. cause I have no hair. But I do my fair share of shaking "it" at my wife.. LOL... WOO HOO!

 

ROFL. good one catfish ladee. i was getting stressed out at how procedural a woman's bath was. the man one relaxed me and brought me back to normality. good job!

 

Yea, my husband does too. What's the deal w/ that anyway?? :confused:

 

Thanks for that. Getting a visual of my old man shaking his weiner around with a shampoo mohawk has helped my mood already.

 

LOL. I seen this
http://www.metacafe.com/watch/412867/how_to_shower_men_women/